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2003-07-17 Yummy was kind enough to suggest to me that the unidentifiable, gelatinous sea creature washed up on the Chilean shore was Jared’s excess skin, the whereabouts of which I questioned a few months earlier, in an entry titled, "And They Weren't the Good Kind of Dog Treats Either; They Were Not Flavored Nor Did They Contain Any Healthy and Delicious Cow Marrow". However, a colleague of mine had already informed me that the 40-foot-wide blob was in fact her lost diaphragm. My first thought was that it was probably a discarded douche bag. The scientists say it is actually a huge, decomposing sperm whale. It turns out we were all right, in a way.
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