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2004-11-23 I bought some new underwear. Speaking of, have you seen that commercial where a reasonably attractive, well-dressed actress holds up what appears to be a maxi-pad and says in a conspiratorial tone, "Let's talk about leaks. You know, those little leaks that have nothing to do with your period." The actress then gives a coy laugh, because nothing says "feminine mystique" like "leaky vagina", and engages in a series of challenging stretches. I saw that on television and was all, "Leaks? Little leaks? Vagina? Little vagina leaks?" It took me a full minute to realize that SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT PEE. LITTLE LEAKS OF PEE. The best thing about the commercial is her delivery; it's like, "Ladies, time to discuss that elephant in the room that we've all been ignoring--namely, your leaky urethras. And don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about." Then she throws back her head and giggles, as if to say, "Me? Right now? I'm sitting in a puddle of my own wet and LOVING IT." The actress really sank her teeth into the acting part of the commercial too; on second viewing, it becomes clear that when she races up those stairs, she is peeing her pants like there is no tomorrow; when she is laughing with her friends, she's pissing herself helplessly all the while; when she assumes a difficult yoga position, the pressure on her bladder is so great that urine cannot help but leap from her loins in a fragrant arc. THAT, people, is a nuanced performance.
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